Rap Lyrics - Lets Beef

-Dimez- · #1 05-06-2011, 11:05 PM

Listen I wanna become a rapper one day. And I've been writing some lyrics. I even have a couple of songs. Wanted to know, what do u guys think of these lyrics? Pls be honest. I won't be offended. If there is anything wrong with it, plz tell me. It will help me improve it:

Here is one of my songs. Please tell me what do you think of it and be honest. You can say it\'s shit or it\'s great:

It\'s all bout the tactics/figure out the plan and you\'ve finally hacked/it feels fantastic/\'till u get ur head axed, now they\'ve finally jacked it/it\'s their desire to have it/but their fuckin habits get in the way to understand it/they hop fast like rabbits, till I catch \'em, even tripped in acid/stick my foot up their ass cuz that\'s what their lackin/hunger is the package I\'m battlin/droppin bombs on me fuckin strugglin/cut their fuckin heads off and now I have a snackin/no more, backing off from tackling the rankings/I\'m slacking the world/leaving it in a furious twirl/trying to get trust from all these boys and girls/all they be doin, is leaving my mind in a depressed swirl, curled up in my fuckin dreamworld/nor understood the magic in their brains/what causes them to be all happy and great/while I\'m standing here being the figure of hate/just couldn\'t relate/didn\'t realize I was bout to be the best bait/bout to migrate/from nowhere to skate/tried to increase my reputation/instead I fell like a dumbwaiter dropping his plates/spirits in hesitation/so u changes my destination/decided it was time for a new spontaneous generation/went from crap to rap illustration/
(End of Verse 1)
[Chorus] (Haven\'t thought of one)

No one believed me/told me I was trying to deceive them by stealin raps off an eminem CD/tried to tell em it came from inside me/but these motherfuckers keep on thinking I\'m lying/so I went to my bedroom and just started crying/felt like stunt flying with no parachute just knowing I\'m dying/something told me I needed to stop whining/wanted at least a minute of shining/emotions stopped reclining, my pen and notebook started combining, defying anyone who denied me/ (Still trying to come up with more lyrics)

-Dimez- · 05-06-2011, 11:05 PM

Listen I wanna become a rapper one day. And I've been writing some lyrics. I even have a couple of songs. Wanted to know, what do u guys think of these lyrics? Pls be honest. I won't be offended. If there is anything wrong with it, plz tell me. It will help me improve it:

Here is one of my songs. Please tell me what do you think of it and be honest. You can say it\'s shit or it\'s great:

It\'s all bout the tactics/figure out the plan and you\'ve finally hacked/it feels fantastic/\'till u get ur head axed, now they\'ve finally jacked it/it\'s their desire to have it/but their fuckin habits get in the way to understand it/they hop fast like rabbits, till I catch \'em, even tripped in acid/stick my foot up their ass cuz that\'s what their lackin/hunger is the package I\'m battlin/droppin bombs on me fuckin strugglin/cut their fuckin heads off and now I have a snackin/no more, backing off from tackling the rankings/I\'m slacking the world/leaving it in a furious twirl/trying to get trust from all these boys and girls/all they be doin, is leaving my mind in a depressed swirl, curled up in my fuckin dreamworld/nor understood the magic in their brains/what causes them to be all happy and great/while I\'m standing here being the figure of hate/just couldn\'t relate/didn\'t realize I was bout to be the best bait/bout to migrate/from nowhere to skate/tried to increase my reputation/instead I fell like a dumbwaiter dropping his plates/spirits in hesitation/so u changes my destination/decided it was time for a new spontaneous generation/went from crap to rap illustration/
(End of Verse 1)
[Chorus] (Haven\'t thought of one)

No one believed me/told me I was trying to deceive them by stealin raps off an eminem CD/tried to tell em it came from inside me/but these motherfuckers keep on thinking I\'m lying/so I went to my bedroom and just started crying/felt like stunt flying with no parachute just knowing I\'m dying/something told me I needed to stop whining/wanted at least a minute of shining/emotions stopped reclining, my pen and notebook started combining, defying anyone who denied me/ (Still trying to come up with more lyrics)

**Manhattan** · #2 05-07-2011, 09:41 PM

all i have to so is work on your multiple rhymes singles are just boring man when you think about it even 5 year old kids can rhyme lying trying crying dying (No Offense) not trying to be a dick at all im just letting you know

**Manhattan** · 05-07-2011, 09:41 PM

all i have to so is work on your multiple rhymes singles are just boring man when you think about it even 5 year old kids can rhyme lying trying crying dying (No Offense) not trying to be a dick at all im just letting you know