LBTT May: Lizman vs P ▲ R I S [P ▲ R I S wins 3-0]

[NOBLE]

@Lizman vs @P ▲ R I S
Verses are due Thursday, May 21st 11:59PM Est (GMT -4).
Verses are to be posted in THIS thread.
There are NO EXTENSIONS.
Verses must be 20-30 lines long.
Voting is 3-0 KO, 3-1 TKO or first to 5.

Topic:

[S O U L R I T E]

The World:

Before us is a symbol, a sign of living free, as perfect
What once stood tall as equality, now is visually perverted
The forefathers of wisdom seem absurd
It's our mistake of thinking classification and Liberty Is Purchased

We used to smile at others, but now our smile is contingent
We put positivism in the papers, but send cameras to violence in an instant
Our great nation...as if God created the world for his love
And we think we're the only Island that was gifted

How many times were your smile and betrayal congruent?
Such a horrible thing how we all relate to failure as fluent
The wider we smile, the more convincing
One could almost say The Faker, The Truer

The United States (In Response):

I've given you resources, all of the useful, importance
Now you show the worst of me to the world, all the news and reporters
9-1-1 was ironic, which one of you were supporters??
Terrorize and place the victim, ohhh how your views are distorted

i used to be neutral, but why even respect your commandments?
of peace and equality? when our deals were left and abandoned
oil, trust, import, weapons, advancements
i poured out my best to you, and in return you left all it trampled

[Lizman]

The Lightning Struck Tower

Your Reluctance To Kill, In The End Where It Matters
Your Gumption Fulfilled, Innocence Thats Been Shattered
Pedestals That Have Been Brought Up, Scornful Hatred In Satire
An Authority Figure Against Authority, Sculptured As Quagmire?
A Nihilistic Existence, Counterfeitness Within It
Doubt, Suspicion, Assistance, Will Be Sadistically Given
Blood Splattered And Masked, Comedic Scars Having Laughs
Resistance Futile To Wrath, Decayed Facelifts Abashed
Smiles Facing The Death, Cruel Jokes That Ignite
Spur Of Moments In Jest, Crown Of Thorns To Midnight
There's Sickness Within, It Has Been There All Along
Wishing Freed In An End, That Will Pass Its Aplomb
Seeing Light In A Tunnel And The Vice For Its Deathstroke
Begging Seer Overhead, One On Side And In Escrow
The Silent Cries While Its Struck, The Crushing Mutes While Its Hit
Green Light To The Action, Falling Skies The Abyss
Prickling Loss The Bereavement, Countermeasuring The Deadening
Finds Enamored Of Leakage, It Escaped Its Own Red Ink

I think Lizman was in point as far as the topic provided, however i got lost in all the vocabulary sounded too forced. Now paris on the other hand had some nice thoughts and deliered a nice read. Could go either way. Thought paris did a little more here. Voted 6-5

one had the vocab but didnt really try to relate to the readers which is a selfish approach. look like a bunch of words together that painted no picture but a dictionary. Feel like one was more sympathetic untimately resulting in holding the attention of his readers by smoother rhymes and linguistics more prevalent in everyday speech. vote's for paris

[Black Book]

Alright, it boils down to this. PARIS had a good idea; he just didn't fully execute it. It was left a little ambiguous. It could have been executed a little better. He had decent rhymes and flow to it, nothing that really hurt him. Then Lizman had good multi's and it was a smooth read. The vocab was good but appeared so randomly with less advanced words surrounding it that you get the feeling he just put it in there to put it in there. From a technical standpoint, he won this battle, but topically, he did not. There was no clear point to all of his rhymes. And a topical is designed to convey a point or tell a story; neither of which were accomplished by him. So while Lizman was better with the devices of a topical, PARIS was better at what is the true essence of a topical.

VOTE: PARIS

[Lizman]

Originally Posted by -ANONYMOUS-

I think Lizman was in point as far as the topic provided, however i got lost in all the vocabulary sounded too forced. Now paris on the other hand had some nice thoughts and deliered a nice read. Could go either way. Thought paris did a little more here. Voted 6-5

You Cannot Vote On Anything.
Especially Things That Have To Do With Text.
I Think You Made That Clear When You Voted On A Text Battle.

---------- Post added at 05:57 PM ---------- Previous post was at 05:56 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Row

one had the vocab but didnt really try to relate to the readers which is a selfish approach. look like a bunch of words together that painted no picture but a dictionary. Feel like one was more sympathetic untimately resulting in holding the attention of his readers by smoother rhymes and linguistics more prevalent in everyday speech. vote's for paris

I Understand Where You Coming From.
However Its Completely Untrue.

If You Want To Broaden Your Topical Peninsula Pm Me And I Will explain To You The 4 Perfectly Combined Themes That Were Illustrated In My Topical.

---------- Post added at 05:58 PM ---------- Previous post was at 05:57 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Black Book

Alright, it boils down to this. PARIS had a good idea; he just didn't fully execute it. It was left a little ambiguous. It could have been executed a little better. He had decent rhymes and flow to it, nothing that really hurt him. Then Lizman had good multi's and it was a smooth read. The vocab was good but appeared so randomly with less advanced words surrounding it that you get the feeling he just put it in there to put it in there. From a technical standpoint, he won this battle, but topically, he did not. There was no clear point to all of his rhymes. And a topical is designed to convey a point or tell a story; neither of which were accomplished by him. So while Lizman was better with the devices of a topical, PARIS was better at what is the true essence of a topical.

VOTE: PARIS

I Have No Respect At All For You So Will Not Ever Tell You The Excellent Theme Behind This.

[NOBLE]

@P ▲ R I S wins by 3-0 KO. Thanks to all who voted.