The awkward confessions thread

[Shodan]

I believe in a large number of conspiracy theories.

I write deliberately nonsensical fundamentalist Christian pamphlets and leave them in random places/give them out.

---------- Post added at 06:41 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:41 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Jack Herer

I once pissed in my roommate's shampoo.

The real question here is whether he had it coming. Some people deserve to have their shampoo pissed in.

Originally Posted by Nyarlathotep

I believe in a large number of conspiracy theories.

I write deliberately nonsensical fundamentalist Christian pamphlets and leave them in random places/give them out.

---------- Post added at 06:41 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:41 PM ----------



The real question here is whether he had it coming. Some people deserve to have their shampoo pissed in.

Prank war.

[Shodan]

For the last fuckin time people, I'm not gay and I'm not in the closet either. My mental gender is indeed female and pretty much everyone knows it. I never denied this.

Originally Posted by Nyarlathotep

For the last fuckin time people, I'm not gay and I'm not in the closet either. My mental gender is indeed female and pretty much everyone knows it. I never denied this.

The plight of the male lesbian.

[Shodan]

Originally Posted by Jack Herer

The plight of the male lesbian.

Indeed.

I fucked a bitch with a broomstick, the same broom that I didn't clean my room with .

[Mayneak]

Whenever Im done with food goods (milk carton, biscuits, box of chocolates) I put it back where I found it so whoever thinks there having a nice treat...are not.


I've done this so much that 9 times out of 10, I don't even realize I'm doing it.

I tickle my gummy bears before I eat them.

[BENSON THA GREAT]

I fuck my girl in the butt and pretend its GRIZZ'S SISTER o.O

If someone attempts to have a conversation with me, I NEVER add to the conversation or add follow up questions. "Hot today innit Dave?" "Yep". "You going out this weekend" "Dunno".

If someone asks me my age, specifically police, I genuinely can't remember my age.

If someone asks me for directions, I will say I don't know just to avoid having to talk to them.

In college I walk 30 minutes to a shop to kill time rather than hang out with the guys from my class because most of them play Yughio. As a pasttime, I play yughio online. Haven't told them.

On tests where I know only an external examiner will see it and will never have any communication with me, I will make as many jokes as possible in the hopes that some random human being's day is brightened up.

When I was 14 I used to pretend I smoked so that I'd have an entry point of conversation with girls. Fucking worked.

I always sit on the outward isle of wherever I'm sitting incase I need a quick escape. Don't know what I'm preparing for.

As an assignment in college, I had to write a guest list for a fake meeting about repairing the car park. I added Kanye West, Optimus Prime, The Three Ninja Kids, A Tiger and Madaline McCann. No one got the joke.

Three months later, they began fixing the carpark. I joked to someone that it must have been because of my guest list. They didn't get the joke.

If someone says something to me which I don't understand, I'll say "sorry?". They're repeat. I'll say "Sorry I didn't get it again". On the final time, I will reply "Yes" no matter if it was a question or not, then I'll make a hasty escape. Hey, might be why I sit on the outside seat?