Fidel Z: I've lived your verse a few times in my Life, Lol. I feel like your rhymes & concepts were a little basic, you could definitely do better. Imagery was decent when you set up the bathroom scene & the club scene. However, there wasn't much Multi usage & I feel like you could've written a better ending. He could've lost his main bitch over dancing with 2 hood rats? I woulda ended it with his Girl coming home, seeing the two bitches from the bar naked in her bed & spazzing out. Nobody regrets a Ménage, Lol...
Phroxen: Once again, a court-house setting. I just read Dono's topical which revolved around a crooked Judge. My topical was a Closing Argument in a Murder case. I guess great minds think alike. Nice alliteration & imagery, you definitely painted a vivid picture of what led the protagonist to that Court room. I would've liked to have known why the murderer killed his daughter. Was he a pedophile? an Assassin? was it a random act? But that's my only criticism of your verse. I think your verse was much deeper, conceptionally. Your "No Regrets" theme seemed more valid, & emotionally relevant than your opponents. Which gave you the nod
Vote: Phroxen
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ET the Refugee
I'm so old i have trouble holding my poop in when i fart.......Hows that for imagery?
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Might be a bit premature, but... Quote of the Year? Lol
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