*474 so this is a mock battle for a basic battle league, i havent been doing so great the last 3 battles i cuz i havent been on da internet in a long time im using my mums so just critiq me on this verse how i can improve, i read da other comments on my real battles

Posted on: 2019-01-19 00:27:59

so id just like to see how this can be better of it was a real battle verse thanks. i accidently pressed add comment n vote n said "alerted moderators" so my bad. ok thanks this a basic verse kinda short.

Posted on: 2019-01-19 00:29:26

Salute
Rated: 7

Posted on: 2019-01-27 00:47:22

Ok I see you
Rated: 6

Posted on: 2019-02-23 15:08:22

Ok, like me you also want to inprove, so i will give a full analysis. Firstly, I think that the rap has to have more punchlines that are creative and actually strike at the person themselves, instead of just at general. You can also change lines like “Da high ladders” and “son in ny” cause they don’t rhyme with anything else in the cypher. Also your rhymes should have somewhat of a “plot” to follow. The rhymes shouldn’t be disconnected (2 different disconnected plots max in an 8 bar line imo) and should usually all relate to each other.

Posted on: 2019-03-10 03:12:53

Good bars
Rated: 9

Posted on: 2019-06-22 04:35:08