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Battle started: March 28th 2020 at 00:25
Challenger joined: December 31st 1969 at 19:00


Voting has ended for this battle (battle finished on 2020-03-28 00:59:32).


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  Member Comments
ChodderTFungus
<ZLLA>

Wilderness verse was decent but just didn't have the ferocity to it that Cosovic had, he came out swinging and never stopped. Every punchline he threw hit and he just went apeshit. Dope battle

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Posted on: 2020-03-29 19:14:38 Private Message ChodderTFungus


WILDERNESS: Conceptually, you had some ok pieces. However your wording is poor and so too was the execution. This really hindered the impact of your punchlines. Also the WP didn't go, imo. 

Cosovic: Opening bar's concept was ok... 'Head & Shoulders' is a played one though. Also the rhyming of the last multi isn't as smooth as the first two in that bar. Following bar was better, could have done with more work on delivering the WP but still, not bad. At the ending your bars trailed off and had a different style also... This is a tough one to call here. Leaning towards Cosovic for the first half of his set. 

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Posted on: 2020-03-30 02:15:07 Private Message 2FUEL


WILDERNESS: I felt the first bar's concept was only tangentially relevant. You're saying he's the 'angry bird' who's 'Chirping loudly' but when you used 'fly' it relates to the 'round' and not necessarily to him. I feel it's better execution when you use related concepts like bird, fly, chirp, etc...and they all point to the same subject. A similar thing happened on the next line when you said his team gets 'roasted' and that the 'ash' catch them all. I get that 'raost' and 'ash' are related, but the way you used them doesn't necessarily show relevance...and saying "ash catch them all" is just awkward wording. I think you're on the right path in terms of weaving relevancy of concepts into your verse, but I think you need to improve on the execution, mainly subject/concept agreement and exploiting the double meaning more.

Cosovic; I liked the head and shoulders/dandruff line. It was gruesome. The genes/jeans/cheater exposed line didn't really hit for me. I get that people cheating often involves swapping bodily fluids with DNA (genes), but what does that necessarily have to do with being on pavement? I liked the passport photo/foreigner/chest and face line. Again, it was gruesome and "4 in her/foreigner" was a really good wordplay that worked very well in that bar where both meanings were exploited.  The last bar wasn't really that impressive.

Overall, I felt Cosovic got this. There were ups and downs to both verses, but I felt Cosovic had better execution and better use of complexity. Nice battle fellas. 

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Posted on: 2020-03-30 23:47:56 Private Message NOBLE

 

 
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