all fair vote good battle

Punches won this one

Well I came to watch the two lowest ranked people on the site battle it out, and holy shit was I not dissapointed. Jay, you haven’t learned a thing since 2015, we keep telling you over and over how to get better, but you still don’t have punchlines, multis, or anything needed to make a battle rap. Bobby, you had decent multi’s and actual attempts at punchlines and metaphors, which is what won you this battle.

Jay: I’m not wasting my time telling you what you need to improve on in detail, ive done it multiple times before. 1: Have Multi’s. 2: Cut all and any self hype lines, unless used as a setup. 3: Have metaphors that actually make sense, how does ink fucking relate to Taylor threads clothing. 4: Have wordplay, wordplay is also known as a double-entendre, a saying with two meanings. 5: actually have proper punctuation

- No multis

- No punchlines

- No Punctuation

- Weak Metaphors that make no sense

- Have wordplay.

Bobbybonghands: Well, it’s not like I can’t say you haven’t improved. You’ve been doing better and better since you first joined, but there’s still a Mansion of room for improvement. The only things I can say was a really strong positive for your verse tho, was that some of your multi’s were nice, and that you had some good concepts. Firstly, you have some very questionable rhyming in your verses. Example, speak and think aren’t nice even half rhymes, they are no where near rhyming. Secondly, there are a lot of spelling mistakes in your verse, most notably Gruesome and Veins. Thirdly, cut the self hype shit. No one likes it. Fourth, make sure you’re concepts have a good execution. The burn victim concept should have wording like this “You couldn’t — even if you were a —“, “I could call you — from the way you —“. These give a clean swift, non wordy execution to the verse. Fifth, make sure your dissing something that actually matters. Like “recycle more than I should,”, homie what the fuck even is that.

+ Good concepts

+ Improving

+ Some nice multi’s

- Multiple Broken multis

- Needs better execution

- Punchlines lacking punch

- Better use of metaphors would help

This guy is constantly getting banned and then comes back the next day. Jays verses are just getting tedious now. There all over the place. He’s not improving. Every thing he post almost seems exactly the same as the last. I’m just being honest.