This one was close, cause i think yall made the same type of mistakes. I think I would edge rhyming out to artifica1. Both had lots of broken multis though. One had better readability, though I think Nikatine was being a bit more creative - just had a lot more wording issues within his verse. This is close as fuck, but I am ever so slightly leaning this way.

PRO TIP: When you are capping your multis, the syllables gotta match up otherwise its considered a broken multi... for example:

KICK IN THE DOOR

SPLITTIN' HIS CORE

^Both have 4 syllables, and sound clean.

KICK IN THE DOOR

SPLITTIN HIS DAMN CORE

^One has 5 syllables, and sounds way off.

This is seen alot in your verses, and try to stay away from 2 syllable multis, shocase a bit of your skill by hitting 4+ syllables. Keep this in mind during construction of your verses, internal rhymes are cool as well.... think of it in this aspect:

"Set-Up" ---> "PUNCH!!!"

Spend 2 lines per bar, and try to come up with four solid properly set up bars. Maintain relevance within your set-ups to connect with your final punchline. The goal is to be creative, with solid execution.

I hope this sets yall in the right direction. Good-battle and fairs in !

thanks for the tips Seul, i'll keep it in mind for the next battle, and Nikatine if you want to do this again let me know, i've got more for round 2.

Thanks for the advice Seul, I think I know what you mean.  Artificia1, I'm up for round 2 if you want. Send me a battle. 

one had an attempt at better punches here ... both should read more battles and see how others structure a verse, it's typically - ..... "setup" .... "PUNCHLINE"!! or somethin like that, and try being more creative with your execution to make your punches land with more sting ... fairs in