Whole verse was a Rebuttal: Cat bars=Panther bars Baseball Scheme= Football Scheme Comment Only
Posted on: 2014-04-24 11:18:02

GB. and GL ma Nigha.. Comment Only
Posted on: 2014-04-24 11:18:41

GB #SAVEMONEY Comment Only
Posted on: 2014-04-24 16:05:17

this shit was tight both had a good combo of punches but ones multis just killed it. them flips tho. fairs in Voted: HandWrapz /
Posted on: 2014-04-24 19:12:01

feel one had a smooth flow, concepts couldve been a little more creative. the other had attempts at wordplay, but it was either played a little or was forced. multie was broken and the other were basic. felt he had the concepts to take the W, but just didnt capitalize on it. over all a solid battle. feel my winner was more clean with the material he presented. high 5, low 5. Voted: HandWrapz /
Posted on: 2014-04-25 00:18:00

More clean.. I had the concepts but didnt piut it together. itts played out but didnt make sense to you. Imsoo fucking done with this Fuck boi Didnt I block you?? Comment Only
Posted on: 2014-04-25 02:00:07

SUPER GUY: Looks like this 'Dudes of Track' I think he needs to FACE MORE CATS we all know he would 'Run Home' if he could, best REPLACE THOSE MAPS because I watch this Pussy Paws/Pause.... an get flipped back like 'BASE BALL CAPS' ^^^^^^^^^first off, for an 8 liner, this type of long setups dont work, your losing valuble punches ...never do this ish in a 8 liner.. keep the setup one sentence towards your multi, make sure its relavent to your final punch.... in this case your final concept is 'pussy pause', and your flip on the concept is baseball caps.... i see that you tried to add a reference to baseball wit 'run home', problem is that it doesnt relate properly to baseball caps..... if you were talkin bout baseball(the game itself) then it wouldve worked somewhat better ... as it stands, its a noble effort just poor choice... i wouldve gone wit more 'hat' type references, like 'lids' , or off the top, or something in line to what the caps used for in an actual baseball game..... ex.. i'd 'protect your face' if im RAISIN HANDS, to LAY SOME SLAPS, till welts 'cover ya dome'quicker than SHADIN CAN wit a BASEBALL CAP.....so here we have one 'reference' 'protect ya face', which is what the purpose of a tru baseball cap has.... and it also covers your dome which is the what you do wit a hat..... on top of that, the bar is more concise, and less wordy,, ... which opens up room for more punch attempts... now 'run home' and BEST REPLACE THOSE MAPS? why would he replace maps? is it to hide his home? or he cant find his way home? this is 'filler', it makes little to no cohesive sense.... lastly avoid 'paws/pause wordplay, shit is very played.. and unless its in conjunction or combined with another complex wordpun or play, or flipped extremely well, it is very poor..and i'd not recommend attempting it as wordplay...... rest were very rudimentary attempts at tryin to add relavence wit 'reference words' within your setups , which i applaud you trying , because most dont care to use relavence , but you need to try and end the accompanying line wit some type of simile, or diss, otherwise its just a runon setup or basic disses that dont lead anywhere... Voted: HandWrapz /
Posted on: 2014-04-25 03:57:42

iWREKM- "Wild Cats" Form nations (formations) to "run it" AMBITIOUS!//Black Panther! we feed lines(felines) for our Sons best WISHES!/ ^^^^^^^^^ you need to stay away from random type lines like this.. wildcats form nations to run it ambitious.how does this at all attack your opponent..? its not even self hype... this shit is filler .... and in an 8, this is wasted space.... next is where is the punch? your couplet should contain a setup(first line) and end punch(secondline) this is the basic structure for a battle bar.... here i see filler that leads nowhere other than 'random thought... next line 'black panther ' relates to wildcats... but again, theres no hit... toward your opponent... then we have wordplay, which is decent attempts, but worded very 'forced'.. wordplay doesnt work like that,, especially in text... feed is not fee.... form nations, dont work either fam... you cant 'force ' two words to be another word... they have to naturally look or sound like the other meaning you r tryin to convey... Voted: HandWrapz /
Posted on: 2014-04-25 04:09:30

also, lose the brackets, it deters from your verse, and makes the lines look cluttered, also, if you word your lines properly, you wont need to convey what your metaphors sopposed to mean with ()... again you making the same mistake that superguy is doin, and that s using two lines to setup your end, which was 'see a black cat' and act superstitious... which is a decent flip, but doesnt hit ... so the dudes superstitious? how is that a damaging insult? it wouldve hit harder if you had said.....its 'badluck for you' if we DUEL WIT FISTS KID, so 'cross this black cat once' and ya gonna be 'hit' wit more than SUPERSTITION/ Voted: HandWrapz /
Posted on: 2014-04-25 05:05:20

in this case your making an attempt to be agressive, threatening to hit him, and your flippin the meaning of black cats and the belief in what they bring... your original line is just stating 'hes acting superstitious', which is pretty boring and straight forward... try to find a fun or clever angle as much as possible.. or find a stronger and less forced way to be relavent... rest of the barswere poorly structured imo., your black cat line worked better wit the first two lines, but instead you used it as the matching couplet to your newton endrhyme... which makes the setup even more irrelavent.... i did however like that you tried to integrate much better 'wordpun'plays, that actually aint forced as badly as the prior ones... new ton of bars sounded less forced, even tho the wording was still not so good.. weigh/way works better than associating it wit 'weight'.. so again lose the brackets..this whole newton line wouldve made for a nice setup to a newton or 'laws of motion' conceptual punch... next was basic, but the outcast references was okay, last bars were probably your best conceptually and relavence... two piece spleen, and 'leavin you wit a half back', works, although smashing thru your scheme shoulda been 'smashing thru your lines' which wouldve been a bit more stronger imo.. i guess scheme could be attributed to defensive schemes... this comes down to who had the cleaner wording wit better scheme work and structure... punches from both sides were poor imo... but one excelled here wit a cleaner read and was structurally more sound ... fairs in..... Voted: HandWrapz /
Posted on: 2014-04-25 05:11:21

Hmm, Alright. One's verse simply had punches that landed more, and he attempted to set them up better than his opponent. Both tried some wordplay here, one had some basic/played wp, and the other was doing it wrong. The short bar style one was doing isn't a bad thing, Rain Matrix did it and was good, and imo it is very effective for 8 liners, but you need to get the most out of it and make sure ur setup directly relates to ur punch and lands. Both should try to have more relevance/direct links in their setups, one needs to use more complex wp (if ur going to use it) and the other needs to do it correctly. Fairs in Voted: HandWrapz /
Posted on: 2014-04-25 12:56:18

Nice drop fellas! SAVEMONEY!!! And also....LOL WTF @ILLoKWENT hahahaha Comment Only
Posted on: 2014-04-25 23:14:12

clear winner here supa..fam it was nice bars i just feel like more punches could have been at the opponent but it didn't disappoint nice work...war sand mos.def!! at irek capped words are used for multies or words that rhyme i mean to perfection broken down multies might have consequences if not fixed in other words you might lose pt.s for it and when battelin' always rmbr it is about attacking your opponent if you lines are filled with 'self salute' voters might think attention wasn't focused at opponent so the main goal is to focus at you opponent..as in using punchlines but you don't wanna throw random punches like i'll kill you it is done using set ups hit me up for further expos... this is if you're a new bii if not then you might some of the vets battles.. checkout these vets..... mayneak,g rizzeat,illokwent,ru le,raw,subreal,autog raph,..try check out some guys at my crew and the ac's also check out the murdda group you'll get it..any ways this was a nice battle nice read...war sand!!!...sup..... fairs in...bulge's out... Voted: HandWrapz /
Posted on: 2014-04-27 05:38:27