Ok battle, respect to both, one sided here, experience won this Voted: mcgabe616 / Dizz Da Dogg
Posted on: 2014-04-24 01:24:21

both should fill the box.. Voted: mcgabe616 / Dizz Da Dogg
Posted on: 2014-04-24 04:12:12

fill the box. nice attempt though. Voted: mcgabe616 / Dizz Da Dogg
Posted on: 2014-04-24 22:28:43

fair Voted: mcgabe616 / Dizz Da Dogg
Posted on: 2014-04-26 00:18:39

@mcgabe616 (NO HATE) but fill in the box more, also you were using very basic "punch rhymes" (aka Nursery Rhymes) example you say a line and only the last word rhymes "dime, lime, crime, time" < Stuff like that. You need more multi's (rhyming connections) @Dizz Da Dogg - You had more of a structured verse however you didn't really have any actual rhymes...Also you did not fill in the box, You are a full bar (2 lines) short...PIPE/NIGHTS does't really flow (on written) You need to structure multi's more like (in your last line) "He wouldn't get in with a TIPSY DYKE usin' a PIXY PIPE I'll "Rip-Lee (Ripley) like BruceY (bruce-lee) and out goes the LIGHT, I kill or FIGHT, hook left to the RIGHT, I'll cut your tounge out with a knife just out of SPITE" (That was a ghost-written example of how to make something more catchy...) NO MINE WAS NOT GOOD, I am just giving an example of better structure. KEEP ELEVATING GUYS! Good spar...I have to pick my winner based on something...So I am gonna throw out evens...I chose my winner (although very simplistic) based on a more filled box and more rhymes...As far as the "Punchline Vote" - Sorry guys...NO HATE!!! Voted: mcgabe616 / Dizz Da Dogg
Posted on: 2014-04-26 10:00:21