I aint fuckin around my dudes lol, ruler going in... __________________ ___________ Kingpin : Audio Wise Ya "Garbage" And Can't Spit, This LAME'S TRASH, See You Ain't Got "Gunz Or Millz" You Just A "Bird Man" Who's "Young Money" Like WAYNE'S CASH === This is pure filler. No impact and the young money scheme is as played as it is basic. === But You Been On The Block W Squares? N Sold "Rock?...Uh Where?" You Never Had A CANE STASH, You Just A Dude That Got His Ass "Kicked From The Rock" Like DAME DASH! === He's been kicked from the rock? How does this make sense? The drug reference i get but the wording is very poor and again i see little as far as impact goes. === But If Them "Can's Open" You'll Be "Left Flat" Like OLD PEPSI, Cuz You "Didn't Have The Balls To Face Me" I Mean NO TESTES, Now You Gettin "D's Nut's Rubbed On Ya Face" Like LOE PESCI! === the build was better here but again wheres the punch? Whats the insult? You'll rub your nuts on his face? Your dissing yourself if anything there. === Now An Got Me "Crushin My Buds" Like POT GRINDERS, Wanted To "Get Obey In The Ring N Kill 'Em" But The PLOTS FINER, Told 'Em To Set Up A Live Battle Cuz He's A HOT RHYMER, Then When I Get There, "On Entrance I'm Flexing Them Big Arms" Like SCOTT STEINER! === Again theres really nothing of merit here at all. The punchline is just self-hype, the build was poorly worded too. === See You Ain’t Holdin The Steel, Homie I’m “Dope In The Field”…POPPY GROWERS, N If I’m “Revvin The Machine” It’s Not The RATTI MOTOR, Cuz If I “Show You A Round, There’ll Be A Mess” Like SLOPPY CHAUFFEURS === Finally we have a half decent punch! The build again was really poor, with bad wording and forced concepts. The punch itself had more potential then it was executed with, so kudos for the concept. === N You Ain't Got The “High Endurance” Or “Right Guard” For This SHOTTY TOTER , Cuz When I Catch You “Under Armed, Sweatin” It's Not BODY ODOR! === again another example of a decent punchline with a terrible build. I wont go into it but the wording is soo forced it takes away from the relation to the punchline in the build. === See You Ain't The TYPE TO SPRAY, But When I Get "O K'D" I'm Not Givin 'Em The RIGHT AWAY! === Very soft closer here. When you short bar, especially at the start or finish it HAS to be heavy. Very poor verse here, especially by your standards. __________________ ___________ Obey: You need to ‘Take Notes when writing’ I mean.. Who thought of BRINGING HIM IN? cus when ‘Accordin to the rest’ we’re only STRINGING KING WHEN we Play him along, cus the only time ‘K dense w/ lines:’ is when there’s SINGING IN THEM!! (A chord in/Cadence) === This bar was a bit of a mess. I liked the concept, the punchline itself was poorly executed but a decent concept nonetheless. The wording really hurt the bar as did the flow and multis. === But you wanna ‘drop five spots?’ when w/ u there’s no LINK IN RETURNIN so you can ‘Tell I’m in mint condition’ so let it SYNC IN KING when REFERRIN to ‘Yourself banking a win on paper’ cus your ‘bars aren’t safe in this place’ and got me ta’ THINK YA.. RE-SERVE PIN! (Lincoln/5 dollar bill/Reserve) === Man this was a long bar, terrible wording, bad flow, poor punchline etc etc. A shame becuase you had a concept worth using but the execution was very bad fam. === He think he Sells dope by his name and YA USING PIPE TOO so if in ‘Bars it’s Da Capped n’ taking shots’ he’s angry & know what THE BOOZIN’ MIGHT DO till I’m debatin: ‘Live or damage ‘em’ cus I’m ‘Beating Da KingPin so bad’ youd’d think I’m ABUSING WHYTE TOO! (Bars Captain/Liver Damage) === Again exactly the same as the last bar. Too long, the wording was bad, you focused soo much on getting your references in that you completed disregarded the fundamentals of battling. Very dissapointing. === What’s up with the ‘Duh’ before names, you’re like a SASSY TEEN CUNT W/ an attitude till I ‘Bash ya head and SMASH YA SPLEEN, GUT.. SHIT and ‘Give ya Work King a leave for head trauma’ for ya BADLY SCHEMED PUNCHES (Working alieve) === the wording man! sooo forced it really takes away from the entire bar, this one was pretty unreadable to be fair, and the punchline / wordplay was very poor. === But you 'dead w/ this shit so you get rock'd' when SHELLS HIT n LEFT you on the floor, so I guess 'I left the King dead when I roll'd through: like ELVIS' DEATH === And THIS is why i preach against basic nameplay. King... elvis... is there a more obvious connection? A very poor way top finish your verse. Yet again it was plagued by poor wording and a stilted flow. YOU are better than this. Much better. __________________ ___________ Overall : Firstly, As for the winner i went with the one who was slightly more consistant. But i have to go in now... I dont know if the pressure of being in a 'final' made you guys over-think, or if you just arent as good as i thought you were, but this was an extremely poor showing from both of you. Al the basics were terrible here. Flow, wording, WORDING, punchlines, multis, the entire package. The absolute truth of the matter is that both verses SHOULD be a 3. If 1 is awful and 5 is not bad then these verses are 3's. People will gas you, and if you choose to see this as hate then thats up to you. But know im fond of both of you as people, and fond of both of you as writers, but you BOTH were sooo bad here. Im throwing down tens for the fact that i feel you guys deserve and need as much feedback as possible, but you already know how i feel. Know that im keeping it 100 thousand over here, and i hope you guys take these words to heart. You've fallen into a hole that many do, the ones who become champions are the ones who climb out and try to cross the bridge from scratch. As for the winner i went with the one who was slightly more consistant. 1/ Posted on: 2013-08-29 17:10:03

Expos: Ass Kicked From The Rock---He Lost To M-Rock In Audio, Daylyt Rubbed His Nut Sweat On Pesci's Face At WD4, And He Didn't Wanna Battle For The 5th Spot At First, Good Luck Bro Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-28 12:42:48

Good battle fam. Expo: Lincoln is on the 5, ''bars'' are held in the federal reserve, banking, all in the scheme. Next line, the liver damage, ''abusing whyte'' cocaine, aka his other name. Duh great whyte. Alieve is for headaches. Rest you got, peace. Good battle n good luck Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-28 19:52:53

Ill come back to this fellas Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-28 20:12:21

First Kingpin: Wasn't bad you're best bar was def the Loe Pesci one that was nice. I just felt some of yours fell short because of a couple of reasons one bar just felt like you were hyping him a bit the first line garbage didnt need to be quoted seemed pretty obvs for anybody to get that. thats about it for negatives (the scott steiner one was good too) overall high 7 Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-29 00:27:50

Obey: The opener up to the Cadence line was dope as fuck the bar after the rhyme scheme fell short for me cuz of the added word in the second line. some of your multis fell short for me but overall they were constructed decent the lincoln reserve wordplay i didn't get at all that might just be me though. Anyways overall about a high 7 too. Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-29 00:31:47

@Dysfunct The bar reference is in the expo ma dude. Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-29 00:32:45

Although one had the bar of the battle he fell a bit short after that so my winner wins this by the slightest marjin of constincency Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-29 00:32:46

All voting expo's should look like this ^ Thanks for the feedback, I'll work on that. Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-29 00:33:48

thanks man it seemed like an important battle so i analyzed it hard Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-29 00:35:31

ACZzzzzzzzzz Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-29 09:03:21

Bulls! Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-29 10:36:37

AC GANG. Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-29 11:06:11

I felt one was a bit simplistic, Ive seen better from him. My winner had better executed concepts punches and scheme. good bout fellas. TheSithVote Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-29 15:21:06

Jeeze, talk about a hit on the self-esteem. Thanks for the feedback though. Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-29 19:14:25

The fair's in. Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-30 07:05:08

Really close I couldn't really even decide but I need the votes. The person I did chose just just just edged it with better readability in my opinion. Good battle. Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-30 07:56:43

fv Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-30 08:48:29

I had to read obey 's verse like three times because it was so overly complex that it didn't flow. Isn't that the point? (To flow?) Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-30 12:42:41

No need for the sway comment, but if you can't understand that you have a lack of understanding of things around you. Because it's a music/bank/drug reference ending w/ how Elvis died reference, kind of a small plot within one. But if people think this is overly complex, ohwell.. Nothing I can do about it. Vote accordingly, and if you don't understand things, don't or ask. Simple as that. Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-30 12:49:09

pshshshsh Winner was just a force Well rounded had a little of everything and his punches hit hard Loser you did crazy to he just edged you in my opinion GB FAIR VOTE Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-30 14:22:04

AC Chloro fam! Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-08-30 23:03:57

One went harder with the punches, first few lines... WOW NICE, Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-31 10:32:19

I expect better, from this match. but a nigga is on fire. Voted: Da KingPin / Obey
Posted on: 2013-08-31 16:07:19