More punches would have turned the tables Voted: Dysfunctional / Jakk Junior
Posted on: 2013-04-13 00:51:08

one had some decent concepts but the punchlines were weak, which fucked up the connection between both, the other really didn't have much either, concepts were really weak and didn't make much sense to me, my winner had a better flow with a more conceptual verse, fairs in Voted: Dysfunctional / Jakk Junior
Posted on: 2013-04-13 10:58:39

CLOSE ONE HERE, EVEN THO THA WINNER HAD AH WEAKER STRUCTURE THA PUNCHES WERE DEFINATELY HARDER AND MORE STANDOUT WIT BETTER BUILD-UPS....GOOD SPAR THO....FAIRS IN...holla Voted: Dysfunctional / Jakk Junior
Posted on: 2013-04-13 19:43:58

Better wording on one side. Voted: Dysfunctional / Jakk Junior
Posted on: 2013-04-14 13:27:18

Close battle great potential from both but neither getting the hits right ...... FV VBF .:X:. Voted: Dysfunctional / Jakk Junior
Posted on: 2013-04-14 17:35:18

Not a very good battle here. One took this because his wording made for a smoother read and thats it. The other had better concepts but his wording really messed up his attempt at punches. My winner had a nicer flow and that's it. Fairs in Voted: Dysfunctional / Jakk Junior
Posted on: 2013-04-14 18:44:21

Both were pretty weak but better wording got this for me... Heres some tips.. Multies - Be sure to always provide multies that are at least 3-6 syllables cuz multies help with the flow and punch and if you dont know what a multie is then its the words that rhymes with each other when your going from line to line.. And always make sure the syllable count is exact and dont force your multies which means make sure there relevant... Take this for example again.... 'Class is in session for ya hoe', so as my belt BUCKLES SMOTHERED im RAMMING LIPS I gave her 'sex ed' and she passed the 'educational facial' with "no TROUBLE UNDER STANDING DICK".... The words that are capitalized are my multies... So the words that are capped in my 1st line rhyme with the words that are capped in my 2nd which makes them multies... Always cap your multies and also always fill in your box... Set-ups - These are very important because they make the punch stronger... I showed you an example of what a set-up is when i was explaning the importance of punchlines... Always make sure your set-up has relevance to your multie/punch or else it will be seen as just filler... Your set-up leaves the reader wanting more and be sure to make your set-ups stand out by putting something around them such as ' ' or " " or ` ` will work just fine so that the reader knows exactly what your talking about... Do not decorate your verse either with different types of symbols like ~ or // or anything of that matter... Punchlines - Punches should always be executed strongly and in order to do so you want some strong set-ups with good concepts... Heres a bar of mine i used in the past...'Class is in session for ya hoe', so as my belt BUCKLES SMOTHERED im RAMMING LIPS I gave her 'sex ed' and she passed the 'educational facial' with "no TROUBLE UNDER STANDING DICK"... Everything inside of the ' ' has to do with class and oral favors lol so those are set-ups for my punch which is inside the " " and the use of understanding was used as wordplay cuz under standing dick means under an erect dick and understanding dick means she understands it... You wanna provide punch after punch after punch and humiliate your opponent....Great concepts - Talking about someones mom is old unless there is creativity involved with it but the concept is very juvenile so try speaking on things that are going on in the news or with celebrities or evening talk about a volcano but make sure you convert it into a punchline and attack the hell out of your opponent.. theres so much to rap about and saying someones mom is fat or a hoe is very basic... Voted: Dysfunctional / Jakk Junior
Posted on: 2013-04-15 18:28:46

Fairs in, Q's out. Voted: Dysfunctional / Jakk Junior
Posted on: 2013-04-15 18:30:57

Yo I apologize I wasn't able to get this. My bad man. Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-04-17 15:18:02