Expo: SheepSkin = Degree or Diplome (jp), Juggling frogs = (Idiom) Trying something difficult, Skeletal Chains = His Bones.. Else is clear. LCee!! Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-03-02 12:33:16

hmmm.hard to judge..oh no..not cuz they so skillful and even..its cuz they hard to read..flows off in most spots..syllables don't match up even readin the swag is hard..not really that its forced..i jus think yal was typin and thinkin at different speds while yal wrote..slow down on personal spars..add more wow punches/info that makes us jump to the next line..and when we jump the next line better be more killer than the last we read.peace..winner won imo by his opening line Voted: Soly / Brute
Posted on: 2013-03-02 12:50:39

Soly: Remember when your structuring your verse that the two most important components to a battle verse are set-up and punch. Set-up/punch. Your verse had some animal references throughout but they were just there. You didnt reference them at all, just put them in quotes. It was strange and did nothing for your verse. Now if you had brought all that together and used it in a punchline, it could have been effective, but as it was it added nothing to the verse. Your multis were ok in spots, broken in others. They could stand to be tightened up. Most of your disses were meh, nothing really exceptional here. Next time you write a verse, try thinking of a punchline first and then build a set up around that. That might help you put together a more dangerous battle verse. Keep elevating. Voted: Soly / Brute
Posted on: 2013-03-02 21:09:02

Brute: You had a couple of flips that were decent. Nothing incredible but they did some damage. You are hit and miss on your multis. The one that really stood out was "SMOKING CANNIBUS LATE" you tried to extend multies but it would have read better if you uncapped, "random, smoking, and flat". They didn't work that way at all. I get that you were working SAVAGE and RANDOM on the slant form your first line, but it didnt follow through. SICK BETTA THAN HIM and CINDERELLA MAN SHIT was a lil stretched and a lil forced as well. The shit at the end of cinderella man was disjointed filler that read weird. Also Skeletal chains was forced, it doesnt work well. Im also confused about your last multi, PERMANANT MAYEM? Is that Mayhem? Maim? I'm not sure, and it isnt working as a rhyme either way. All that said, I see potential and you have a grasp of proper structure. I know I criticized you harshly but there was some good stuff in there as well. Votes in. Voted: Soly / Brute
Posted on: 2013-03-02 21:16:38

Neither impressed here but my winner got this with slightly stronger punches but he needs to work on his concepts, set-ups and execution and so does his opponent... Yall gotta just let that flow and dont try to be to creative.. Take a look at RULE, DaDDiO or reEFer's battles to see what your missing.. If a tip list is wanted then ask.. Overall close but not to good of a battle.. Voted: Soly / Brute
Posted on: 2013-03-03 19:13:16

fairs Voted: Soly / Brute
Posted on: 2013-03-04 06:25:57

These were definitely both an interesting read. I have to agree with Sluggo's analysis here. In the end the one I picked I felt like had a *somewhat* more direct approach at forming punches - although they mostly fell short Voted: Soly / Brute
Posted on: 2013-03-04 21:33:44

Lost Solely Soly xD Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-03-05 16:43:19